I Long For the Feeling to Not Feel at All
by TheNameToNeverBeForgotten
Summary: Taito had finally lost the will to feel. At least his yandere side. So he went to the point where he just repeatedly stabbed himself, trying to get rid of the caring side of himself. He lost the desire to want to have sanity without boredom.


_A scream saying stop, drowned by maniacal laughter. "Stop what?" A crimson red covering the scene, blood staining the clothes of the offender and the victim. Repetitive stabbing, blood splattering. A salty water now streaming down the face of the victim. A soft mutter, "Naze te..." A short stop. The room going silent, so silent you can almost hear the soft dripping of the tears into the lake of blood surrounding the two. A grin, slowly being accompanied by a dark chuckle. "Why not?" was the reply. "Have you had enough? Wasn't this all too much?" asked a soft voice, in the distance._

_Panting heavily now, handle of the blade still tight in hand. The panting being the only sound outside of the dripping of tears and blood. Panting now becoming dark breathless laughter. "What now? You're now as cut up as possible, only thing left to do is deepen those precious bleeding wounds." "But will you do it?" The culprit gritted his teeth at the question, rather offended. 'Will you do it?' Of course he would, why wouldn't he? He laughed again, without further hesitation he entered the blade's tip coarsely into the chest, not too deeply..._

_Why not any deeper? It's almost as if he had a restraint to not cut any deeper than already done. Trying to cover up the short delay, making the depth seem as if that's what he wanted, quickly the blade tore down the chest and just below the navel. Light giggling in the distance. Freezing, the laughter being recognized, just now for his own laughter. "An interference I see. And it's not someone new..." Footsteps approaching the bloody scenery. "So you do recognize me?Well I'm not here to hurt you this time," the new being obtaining a smirk for herself. The purple male, covered in blood stood as he removed the blade from the one on the floor. _

_He turned to face the female, annoyance glittering in his eyes just as clearly as his insanity. "If you're not here to hurt me, then why are you here?" a growl escaping his throat. She giggled, not giving an answer and just gracefully walked over to him. She gently cupped his cheek and gave him a stern look. He tried to pull away, but couldn't make himself do it. A restraint, again, but caused by what?_

_She narrowed her eyes, restraining herself from a growl she tightened her grip on him. "Taito...You've lost." Taito narrowed his eyes and pushed her away. She stumbled a bit backward, but caught her balance. "Taito! You need to stop, if you don't you'll kill yourself," she hissed. He laughed in reply._

"_I'm not killing myself, Kiku...I'm killing a part of myself," he told her with a devious grin. Her eye twitched. She took a step back, confused by what he meant. "W-what do you mean?" she asked, still taking a few steps back. "I am killing the part of myself that is not needed, the part of myself that allowed me to have feeling, that allowed me to get hurt so much, I'm getting rid of it. I don't need it. It's a waste of time, it's a complete waste. Why forgive to never forget? Once you can just not have the reason to have a reason to forgive in the first place?"_

"_Taito, just look at yourself! If you get rid of that part of you you'll have no sanity! You have to try to fight this and have sanity..."_

"Taito... just look at the mess you made... please, try to fight back, regain your sanity...please..." she pleaded, tears now falling down her face. Neru had a concerned expression for both of her friends. She gently hugged Kiku with a small sigh. Taito just started laughing again. He hung his head, still laughing darkly in a low tone. His hair shadowed his eyes. He tightened his grip on the handle one last time before he just threw the dagger across the room. Neru and Kiku jumped a bit. Taito moved his hands to grip his head. He gave a strong expression of pain. He gritted his teeth and gripped his head more.

"Why won't you _die_ already?" he hissed under his breath. Kiku raised a shaky arm to gently touch his shoulder. He smacked her hand away. "Leave now!" he demanded. Neru flinched.

"Taito..." Kiku muttered as she put her hand down.

"Kiku leave now or I'll make you leave...," he threatened releasing his grip on his head. Kiku's red eyes glinted with hurt. Kiku turned to Neru and whispered in her ear, "Stay with him, he's not aware that you're here still." Neru flinched a bit.

"B-but...I don't want to, be alone with him," she whispered scared. She was scared for herself and her friend. Kiku gave her a stern look, saying that she has no real choice. Neru nodded once, understand how important it was for her to stay.

Taito was growing impatient. He growled a bit under his breath. Kiku looked over at him. "I'm leaving," she said bluntly before she turned to the door of his room. She walked toward the door, opened it and left. Neru alternately looked between the door and Taito.

_Taito laughed darkly and looked at Neru. "She left you behind. Well if you don't try to interfere you're fine and won't get hurt," he said with a smirk. Neru flinched, but said nothing. She wanted to interfere, but knew she shouldn't. It's what he wants to do, so she has to just stand by and make sure that he doesn't kill himself in the process of removing the part he doesn't want. "Now, where did that knife go?" He walked in the direction the knife was. He smiled once he saw the knife and grabbed it. He went over back to the being on the floor. It was motionless, lifeless almost. He frowned disappointed. _

"_Are you done?" a bored tone of voice. The typical emotionless tone, a drastic change from the insane tone of voice from just moments ago. With a flick of his cat ears he gently kicked the side of the soulless corpse. "How tragic. I lost my game..." a monotone bored voice..._

Taito let go of the knife. The blood loss finally getting to him, he slowly closed his eye, and fell to the floor, now unconscious. Neru went wide-eyed and quickly went over to him, frantic. "T-Taito," she said. She looked around for something she could do. She saw where he keeps his bandages and went over to it and grabbed as many bandages as she could. She went back over to him. "Bakkkaaa," she said repetitively as she bandaged his wounds. She sighed once she finished. She stood up. She quickly then had a concerned and scared expression again. She bit her lower lip and muttered, "What is he going act like once he wakes up? Is he actually going to behave differently...and if so how much differently?"


End file.
